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Name: SiriuslyPeeved (Signed) · Date: 18/08/10 11:49 PM · Chapter: The Final Stand
I am fascinated by the concept of a war between wizards and Muggles, and by the dynamic you've set up between Draco and Harry/Ginny. Are Harry and Ron Aurors in this story? There are a few sections where you could adjust the balance between showing and telling -- this is something I struggle with in my own work when a back story needs to be laid out. Would you possibly consider writing more about the Muggles' "curse" and presenting it as a prologue? I'd really enjoy reading that.

Overall, the tone of the chapter fits really well with a Western theme and the action scenes are great, clear and concise and exciting. I'd love to see more description of the setting and characters to bring it fully to life. I think you have the beginnings of something great here, Elena!

Author's Response:

Thank you :)

There is more to come here, I just haven't had the chance to update. The point of this chapter is to 'tell' in a sense. To set the scene, the story and what's to come.



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