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Name: BKL8008 (Signed) · Date: 25/03/12 9:36 AM · Chapter: Abbott Ails

As always, excellent. I always thought there should have been more to this scene (Fred's death) and much less in other places of the book. The combination of characters is wonderful as well. I am continually amazed at the quality of your short chapters here. This will probably be my last review for a while, though. Busy season at  work is starting (photos lab) and I won't have much time for fanfiction sites! :(



Author's Response:

Thanks for yet another review. I worked this back from the events in DH. We are told that Lee, Fred and Hannah are guarding one of the secret passages (that's the only time Hannah is mentioned, I think).

I hope to update three times a week (work permitting) I'm rewriting and correcting prior to posting, so I may not keep to schedule, but I'll try.

-N-



Name: BKL8008 (Signed) · Date: 22/03/12 8:08 PM · Chapter: Ernest Endeavours

In such a short piece, you have captured so much and built the character of Ernie so well. We know so little about him, as we do many of the supporting characteres in canon. I like how, with only 1 or 2 lines, you invoke such disgust for Z. Smith. I have to say, I didn't want this chapter to end, either. It was as if we are right there alongside Ernie, feeling his hopelessness. Hufflepuff by nature, his instinct is to try hard and be loyal to his friends - which he can't do when he's all alone. It was almost enough to make one cry, upon rereading it. This is probably the best chapter so far, to date, in this series.



Author's Response:

Thanks for the review.

Ernie is described in the books as pompous, but little else. I wanted to make him a little bit hopeless and out of his depth. He wants to be a brave and noble hero, and thinks he's failing because, until the encounter with the Dementors, he hasn't done much. His being there was really bravery enough.

-N-



Name: BKL8008 (Signed) · Date: 20/03/12 10:22 AM · Chapter: Good Bones

Nice. You don't see much about the Hufflepuffs, or Susan, or Ernie - none of them. I like the characterization of Susan here, and her observations of Ernie as well. Fitting. Your tales are just so good! And it seems you can get the site to work for you to post, too! (Which I can't).



Author's Response:

Thanks again.

I'm astonished at the speed with which this was approved. I submitted it mere hours ago. I'll get the next chapter into the queue now, too.

I've had a few difficulties submitting, but using html codes and dropping the entire thing in as an old-fashioned .txt document seems to work.

-N-



Name: BKL8008 (Signed) · Date: 20/03/12 6:08 AM · Chapter: The Confession of Augusta Longbottom

Wow! When one stops to think about it, even with what little we know about Mrs. Longbottom, one can see her doing something outrageous - but this is a real stunner. Pardon the pun. I was immediately pulled in to what would be in her old letter, and suddenly, there it was. The smack in the face, let's say. One doesn't see that much of Mrs. Longbottom in fanfic, but this is a powerful ending for what would seemingly have been a rough life. 10/10



Author's Response:

Thanks for the review.

I've always had a soft spot for Augusta. Her son and daughter in law were tortured into insanity, so she's bound to be a little grumpy. Is what she did wrong? Criminal? I'll let readers decide.

Now for a sequence of Hufflepuffs, beginning with: Good Bones

-N-



Name: BKL8008 (Signed) · Date: 10/03/12 8:10 AM · Chapter: Protheroe's Perspective

Another excellent installment. The brief but curt ending was just right. Well done for an OC , too.



Author's Response:

Thanks for the review.
The next chapter (The Confession of Augusta Longbottom) is now in the queue.
-N-



Name: datbenik513 (Signed) · Date: 09/02/12 2:54 AM · Chapter: Great to be Back

Sweet Luna. She'd grown to be my most favourite character and I'm a sucker for a nicely written Luna Lovegood fic. I do love to write her as well, for example in "Shadowlands".

This is a loony chapter indeed. Her mind may not fuction the same way other minds would work, yet one can not wish for a more trustful friend than the rather improbable phenomenon called Luna.

I loved each and every word of it. 

On a side note, I'm eagerly awaiting the next chapter(s). I can't imagine what could have possibly prompted your ban from HPFF, but you're not alone. I got kicked off myself a few months ago. I'd gladly share my thoughts with you in private.



Author's Response:

Luna has some ridiculous beliefs, but she's not mad. This was my first attempt to actually get inside her head. I’ve read very few Luna stories, because when I have she’s usually written as completely insane, not the gentle, forgiving, well meaning eccentric she is in the books. Luna will reappear in later chapters.

Next up will be a chapter about an original character (Protheroe’s Perspective) it’s in the queue already, and after that comes “The Confession of Augusta Longbottom”.

As for HPFF I think that (among other things) they tend to ban authors who are not female or teenaged. Every writer who I know has been banned (myself included) is male and mature. Contact me if you want to chat more.

-N-



Name: datbenik513 (Signed) · Date: 09/02/12 2:48 AM · Chapter: Galleon

Why does everybody hate Cho? I don't, my story "There You'll Be" is a proof. Everyone has his/her flaws. In the end, she fought side-to-side with Harry and the rest, even broke her long-term friendship with Marietta because of her betrayal.

One of the most remarkable, most accurate peeks into Cho Chang's mind. 



Author's Response:

Thanks

In my experience (and this is going to sound sexist, sorry) it's mainly female readers and writers don’t like Cho. I’ve no idea why. Nor can I understand why they also hate Pansy but lust after Draco (who is even less likeable than Miss Parkinson).

Cho, in my opinion, was confusedly attracted to a couple of famous boys and it didn’t work out. She went through a lot, but she still turned up and fought.

-N-



Name: datbenik513 (Signed) · Date: 09/02/12 2:44 AM · Chapter: The Calm Before

Blessedly succinct, this small first chapter is. That has been a gloomy year in Hogwarts: terror, fear lurking around the corner and two insane Death Eaters as Professors. The eerie atmosphere is fancily depicted in between your lines. As BKL said, and I would like to expand his opinion: "In this story the unwritten, that thing that can be read between the lines, is much more powerful, much more present than the words written".

The best story I have read on any archive in the past year. Full stop.



Author's Response:

Thanks for the kind words.

This “novel” is almost entirely an experiment in writing techniques. Expect first, second and third person chapters, various viewpoints, and a radio interview. This was a deliberate attempt to write between the lines. There is much which Poppy Pomfrey doesn’t say, I was simply trying to portray the past years event in her anxiety.

-N-



Name: BKL8008 (Signed) · Date: 30/01/12 2:21 PM · Chapter: Great to be Back

Ah, Luna, I love her! You've done a perfect capture of her character here. Probably the best "Luna" I've ever read!



Author's Response:

Thank you. Writing Luna makes me nervous, especially because I've seen so many stories where she's simply bonkers.

-N-



Name: BKL8008 (Signed) · Date: 22/01/12 1:37 PM · Chapter: Galleon

Another excellent piece! I can see it happening exactly like this without any stretch of the imagination. I always did wonder whatever became of the galleons.  I was never ever a fan of Cho, either! hehe. Sorry! To see her in this emotional state just makes my day. Isn't that awful?! Again, well done. I can't wait to see more of these.



Author's Response:

I find Cho a really interesting character, especially because of the hate she gets. It’s astonishing (to me at least) that many people would rather redeem Draco (who is a bully, a bigot and a coward) than Cho (who is good-hearted but weak and a little foolish). Perhaps that's because I'm a bloke.
In the next chapter you’ll meet someone who thinks that it’s “great to be back” at Hogwarts.
-N-



Name: BKL8008 (Signed) · Date: 11/01/12 2:19 PM · Chapter: The Calm Before

This is remarkable. I do so want to read more of these. In the case of Carter, I see even more lines between the lines: 'A boy who will never play Muggle football again. A boy who will walk with a cane for the rest of his life. There are some things that I simply cannot fix.' I have no other words for it. Remarkable. Probably one of the strongest pieces I have ever read.



Author's Response:

Thank you.
Tales is a collection of 25 stories most of which were originally written for the 2010 house cup challenge at HPFF. These stories are expanded and corrected from the hastily written originals and are the cause of my being banned from that site (long story). The next chapter will be submitted today, I hope.
-N-



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