I can't wait to read the next chappie!! Especially if it includes our dear Mr. Malfoy ; )
Author's Response: Chapter 5 brings back your beloved Draco. I had to tell the Trio storyline before I moved on and it took longer than I anticipated. I'm glad you liked that bit. I wanted to show how Harry, but more so Ron, were ready to grow up and take charge. They might only be 18 but they've been through more than any adult could imagine and they wanted to grab the bull by the horns and move on. Please keep reading and let me know how I'm doing!!
Just one question:
"She returned to the kitchen to set the table and book the eggs."
How does one BOOK an egg???
Author's Response: Woopsy Daisy. I will go ahead and cook the suckers then.
Well done.
Author's Response: I'm not sure what I did but I'm glad you liked it. Keep reading please!!
"They placed Kreacher in charge of the decorating of the hall, table placement and food preparation along with the other house-elves at Hogwarts. Kreacher proudly accepted the duty and assured them of the best reception to ever be seen."
A very well done chapter on what might have been. 10/10
Author's Response: I wanted to continue to build on the sense of loyalty between Kreacher and Harry. Harry will need him in future chapters.
Author's Response: I like mushy stuff!! I'm glad you think I captured her personality. I'm trying to keep all of them in character to try and make it believable. (But then again this is fiction about wizards so can any of it be believable?)
I hope to soon get the time to read more. Draco in America is very interesting.
Author's Response: Thanks for leaving a review. I'm glad you didn't say "It's not for me" which means it's not TOTAL crap. It will be interesting to see what you think of the upcoming chapters. I really enjoy your stories and how you delve into the characters thoughts and personality. I'm working on doing some of that in my upcoming chapters. Hope you come back and read some more.
Keep up the good work!!
Author's Response: I'm glad you stopped in for a read and hope you stop back for some more. Since I'm not a writer it's nice to know whether I'm keeping people in character and that what I'm striving to do. Hope you enjoy more!!
What I like the most about this chapter is how Ron steals the show. He's finally come into his own and his contentedness with himself and his place makes him conduct himself in a way that's no longer overshadowed by Harry. Keep up the great work!
Author's Response: I tried very hard to write characters like Molly, Arthur, George and even Dumbledore (when you get to him) in a manner that would remind you of how Rowling wrote them. I'm glad I succeeded!! I always loved Ron as a character. I'm the youngest of 8 myself and I know how it feels to be ignored or overlooked. He had to find his way and he did (finally) I just wanted to see how he could be once he was fully comfortable in his own skin. I'm glad I did it right.
Sorry I took so long to getting around to reviewing your story! I just started posting the first in my series on this site (Hogwarts Revisited), and it made me forget why I wanted to visit this site in the first place!
Anyway, now everything is starting to fall into place for me. I had only read chapters 4, 5 & 6 when I had Betaed for you, so now I get to see what brought them to the point where I started reading...
This is one heck of a meaty chapter--lots of info! I think it all works, though. I really like what you're doing with the characters, and your original character, Europa, already shows a distinctive personality. Well done!
I'm off to read Chapter 2...
Author's Response: Yeah!!! You're here. I feel like "Horton Hears a Who" I am here, I am here, I am heeerrrree!! Thanks so much for stopping in and reviewing. I now have 2 readers!! I'm pumped!! Since you are my Beta and know I've never written before, I appreciate your input as to whether the story has a good concept, now that you know the scenes behind 4,5 & 6. Let me know if I rushed too much in the earlier chapters. I had soooo much to say and no clue how to do it. I'm working on #8 and the whole concept will make sense (I hope) You said to write it all down & you will filter it for me so I'm hoping together we can get the merge into one BIG (but not too big) chapter. My other reader, Holly Ilex, is waiting patiently for the next chapter so I'm off to write more.
Judy,
If you get a bit in your head, it doesn't matter if it's out of sequence, WRITE IT DOWN! Or you'll lose it forever, especially good bits of dialogue. I wrote the whole epilogue to my 2nd story ( 7th yr ) before I'd finished the first story! It just came to me and that's why I'm never without a notebook of some kind. I've had as many as 5 different things being written at the same time as I come up with something or get the answer to a place where I was stuck. Have also thrown out whole chapters , then brought them back, retooled with other characters, because then it worked!
I'll wait patiently, like a good girl . . . . . . . (did you fall for that? No? Smart thingking on YOUR part!)
HE!HE!HE!
Author's Response: I will have to start doing this. I came up with a whole "hook up" section last night (sorry, that is waaay down the line in this story so I'm not revealing juicy details) I'm going to have to scale it back because I don't think they will allow my original version on this site. HAHA --Lot's of lemons (I just realized what you meant by Lemons in one of your previous posts- Gosh I'm so naive) I do however, have the Epilogue already written too. I wrote it after the 1st chapter because I wanted to have a finish line to work towards. I read it over every once in a while to remind myself that there is an end, I just have to think up a good middle. I'm into chapter 8 now. Patience is a virtue. I know what I want to say I just have to get it down on paper. You know, being gainfully employed really interrupts the creative flow. Jeesh!!!
So, Europa is there with her baby . . . excellent. If Darco figures it out, that will be a nice thing, too.
Hermione preggers . . . well, you're sorta following canon, at least with the kids births, so that fits. Now, how are you going to get Draco back in 'the Trio's' lives . . . hummm?
Will wait for the next chapter with as much patience as I can muster . . . posted yet? . . . . now? . . . . not yet? . . . . *sigh*
HE!HE!HE!
P.S. I was talking of Conshohoken of 40 years ago, when I was in college; it was just an exit on the road to King of Prussia!
Author's Response: You're funny. I still need to write the next chapter so it will be another week or so. Hopefully sooner if work doesn't get in the way. HAHA!! I have the whole idea in my head and I just need to get it on paper. I keep jumping ahead and writing future chapters. I have to stop doing that because it's taking my focus off the next ones. FOCUS JUDY, FOCUS!!!! I think you will be quite surprised with the next chapter(s) but I'm not going to give anything away. You'll have to wait and be pleasantly surprised.
Author's Response: Phew, I'm glad you didn't think this story was total crap. I started writing this in August 2008. I found HPFF and got hooked on the Dramione's. This idea popped into my head and I thought I'd give it a go. I had 2 versions in mind and decided to try the Dramione version first. Thanks for the R&R and hope you come back for more. Chapter 7 should be up next week sometime.
As sad and moving as this chapter is, I'm giggling like a fool, having gone to Temple, so I know Hahnemann and Conshohoken . . . hehehe (little giggle) What a place for a Malfoy to land in, I would have thought the Main Line or Germantown at the least! Or Ritterhouse Square ( lived a block south of there when I was first married )
ANYHOW, I'm glad Cissa and Lucius got to come and that they are really a family now, especially Draco and Lucius ( hating Lucius as I do, I'm giving him a break for this story, so I hope he's learned his lessons - in your AU )
All the protective spells make sense as I'm sure there are those in the wizarding world who don't exactly wish the Malfoys well.
Okay, will look for the next chapter evertime I check onto GF and keep sending in this silly reviews!
HE!HE!HE!
Author's Response: Conshohoken is the up and coming "in spot" in Phila. so this is the perfect place for him. You are right about the Main Line being more his family's style,however, I wanted Draco to make it on his own in the world (or the New World) Conshohoken might not be ultra rich but it's a start. Besides, now-a-days the people I know on the Main Line are too "ME,ME,ME" if you know what I mean. Being with Europa and the events of his past has taught him that is not the lifestyle he wants to be around anymore. The home they chose is the perfect place to rebuild a life as well as remodel a home. Thanks for giving Lucius a break. I will expand more on him in chapters to come. I'm half way done next chapter and will see how far I get this week on it. Thanks again for sticking with me. I hope it's been worth it!!
OMG!
What a WONDERFUL chapter.
I loved watching Draco and Europa falling in love and how that all played out. I giggled at Cissa and Lucius' reaction, but they've smartened up over the years, too.
But the end . . . . OMG . . . I feel SO sorry for Draco. What a HORRIBLE descision to be forced to make, but I'm glad he heard and listened to Europa's voice.
Bravo!
One small oops; Stonehenge and Wiltshire is in South WEST England, sweety. over towards the Welsh border. You can sneak in and change that and no-one will ever know. Unless they read this, I guess.
HE!HE!HE!
Author's Response: Oops!! Silly me. I even looked at a map but had in my head that England is East of the U.S. so I just put it in the story that way. I made the correction this morning. Thanks for pointing that out. I sooo glad you are liking this. I was tempted to start their relationship after the Library incident(even drafted it that way) but felt the story would be better if Draco kept it platonic until their separation following graduation. I felt the Dark Mark issue (which I believe he had in HP even though Rowling's only suggests it in the story) would be a personal matter which Draco wasn't ready to share that early in their relationship. I wanted him to be so in love with her, and vise versa, that there would be nothing to keep them apart. I hope it works better than my original version. As for Cissa & Lucius' reaction, I always felt they had a deep love for their son but they took the wrong path in life with Voldemort. There is nothing more stressful in a parent's life than to know that you may have screwed your child's life up by your own poor decisions. I think, in my story, they strongly felt that their son might never find love and would always be shunned by that damn Dark Mark. Or, that he would keep a wall up so as to never find happiness. It's a happy day when a parent can breath and say "Phew, life has a way of working itself out for the best." Plus, I like the idea that Love is a powerful magic. I'm posting next chapter today then things will slow down because I need to get back to writing. I stopped after several weeks of being in limbo with HPFF (I'm still not up on that sight) but now that I'm on Gluttony I'll have to get my butt in gear.
La, la, la, la, LEMONS! Lovely, lovely lemons!
Very descriptive, making wonderful minds pictures of EVERYTHING. Yeah, Kreacher!
I was a bit frightened for Hermione there for a second or two, lest she drown, but I'm sure Geroge provided a snorkel . . .
HE!HE!HE!
MORE PLEASE!
Author's Response: I'm so glad you keep coming back for more!! I worried about whether I was being descriptive enough so I'm glad you think I am. Look for more soon. I'm posting next chapter today and we will go back to Draco story line.
Morning!
Well, that was a really quick, cute, full of stuff, surprising chapter.
I always knew Ron had it in him, that he really did have an organized/tactition's mind. And his words to Hermione's parents couldn't help but get him the 'YES' he wanted. Of course, those two would have gotten married, reguardless, as Hermione is of age, but it was nice that her parents knew 'all about him'. Wonder what she DID tell them?
HE!HE!HE!
Author's Response: You'll find out in the next chapter which is the Wedding & Honeymoon then chapter 5 get's back to Draco and present day. Give me a few days to get #4 on. I posted on HPFF and made changes which I failed to save to my draft (slap me) Then the crash happened and I can't get back into HPFF to even find out what I did. I just know Ginny's vows were the hardest and I posted them directly on the sight and didn't save like an idiot. So I have to come up with something good again!! Thanks again for reading. You are my sole reviewer!
Having a bout of insomnia, so jumped on the web, cruised on over the GF and VIOLA! a new chapter!
First off, I laughed so hard . . . poor Molly . . . . and to have the same 'fight' with her two youngest children almost did her in, didn't it?
And George . . . he'll get his 2 cents worth in, SOMETIME, I'm sure.
Arthur, bless him, remains the calm one, knowing it was coming to this sooner or later . . . . sooner THAN later, it turned out.
Noble restraint on both the boy's part . . . Bravo!
I always thought that Ron had the makings of a good tactician, fight/battle wise, so I'm not ragging on the doofus part anymore, either.
Good chapter, as the aftermath of the battle was dismissed too quickly by JKR. ( don't get me started on how she left Severus to rot in the Shrieking Shack - just Harry naming his kid - middle name - was supposed to gloss over that massive insult to out favorite potions professor -HA! )
Okay, I'll keep an eye peeled for your next installment. Bet I post this review before you even know the chapter is up! It's 12:45 AM . . . do you know where your chapters are???
HE!HE!HE!
Author's Response: I'm glad you enjoyed. The next 2 chapters will be about the wedding then the stories will merge and we will be off and running. I just need to set up some important background information. I'm glad you like Ron. He is just a typical teenager who needed to find his footing. Harry was always forced into his path. Ron just had to get past a few issues to find his. I'm trying to keep everyone in character. I'm presuming you agree that I am. I have a plan on the whole Snape issue. I'm off to post Chapter 3 and if that get's validated quickly then I might have a chance to post #4 this weekend. I'm so glad you have come back for more! Now go get some sleep.
Bucks County? I was thinking western PA, in the mountains, but have been to Bucks County many a time, and agree about the scenery. Will check map & see!
Am on HPFF, too, and lost 20/24 reviews for my first story in the crash. Have posted 6 stories on GF since August, which is MUCH better than HPFF's 'slower than snail snot' system.
So, am looking forward to more of your story and will offer up any words of wisdom that pop into this old brain-pan of mine!
HE!HE!HE!
Author's Response: Western PA is beautiful, State College area, but I grew up near Bucks County. I figured I should describe what I know. Solebury, New Hope, Buckingham. Beautiful areas. I heard about this sight on eHPF (elderlyhpfans) It is a very nice forum for 18+ only. It's mainly a forum for HP fans with a bunch of supportive members. And I agree about the snail pace on HPFF. I posted this story yesterday and it was validated the same day. It took forever with HPFF. Hope to read more on this site.
Well, you certainly packed a huge amount of information into one chapter. So, now that you have the basics in place, you can slow down a bit and let things happen for Draco at a more relaxed speed.
I'm glad Cissa and Lucius are getting on, and they aren't the wizarding society snobs they were before. At least they're happy and usefully employed.
I know you said in your intro that Harry& Ginny, Ron & Hermione got married, but I also hope that you'll have at least Harry and Draco let bygones be bygones, as it were.
I too, think that it would be possible for them to, if not be best buddies, at least understand each other better and keep in touch. ( see my story 'I Owe You My Life -A Wizard's Debt' )
Will put your story on my 'watch for updates' list!
Well done!
P.S.
I live in MD so I'm getting out my maps and looking around PA for a likely spot for WU!
HE!HE!HE!
Author's Response: Yeah! My first review on Gluttony!! Thanks for taking the time to R&R. I had this story on HPFF but my penname & sign- on were effected by the crash and I'm still not up. So I decided to try Gluttony in order to get the story rolling again. I have 6 chapters written with 7th on the burner while waiting for HPFF. The next chapters should be slower (I hope you'll agree) This is my first attempt at writing so I hope it wasn't too fast. Let me know if I could be more descriptive. As for Harry & Draco... time will tell. Since you are MD you know what beautiful country there is in the area. Let your imagination go and find a nice spot in the rolling hills of Bucks County. I'm posting 2nd chapter today so hopefully you can come back again soon. I will be sure to R&R your story. I've read so many stories on HPFF but couldn't leave a review due to sign-on issues. It will be nice to get back into the swing!
Disclaimer: This site is a place to host Harry Potter Fan Fiction, The Vampire Diaries Fan Fiction, Twilight Fan Fiction, Original Fiction, Original Poetry, Drabbles and RPG (Role Playing Game) Fan Fiction. This is a not for profit site and is in no way connected to or endorsed by J. K. Rowling, Scholastic Books, Bloomsbury Publishing, Hachette Book Group USA, Summit Entertainment or Warner Brothers. All Twilight Characters/places/settings are copyrighted to Stephenie Meyer. The Vampire Diaries Books and characters/places therein are the property of L.J. Smith and HarperCollins. The Vampire Diaries TV Series is copyright to the CW Network and Alloy. The Dresden Files/Codex Alera is copyright Jim Butcher. These stories are licensed under the Creative Commons as derivative, noncommercial fiction. All other works of Fan Fiction are copyright to the original creators and no copyright infringement is intended. The original characters and plots are the property of the author and may not be borrowed or copied without permission. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended. TOS, Submission Rules, etc., are property of site admin. Gluttony has been open since 14/02/08.
Bad Behaviour has blocked access attempts in the last 7 days.