There were a few tense disagreements here and there. It might make your story more readable if these were corrected. (switches back and forth between past & present tense when I believe you're aiming at past tense) Good job though!
Author's Response: Oh, sorry for that. I'm noticing that I do that sometimes now, so I hope to have that habbit corrected soon. I am so glad to have made you smile and hope that you read the rest of the series
I think you got Neville just right, and the ending was fine.
I always thought that those 2 would get together, even tho JKR says otherwise. I prefer to think that they did.
Author's Response: Thanks, I always think they belong together too. It was really a surprise when I found out that Luna marries some bloke named Scamander, lol. Thanks for reviewing^_^
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