It's got some good ideas, and I think it's just fine. You have to have a somewhat slow chapter for exposition and to get things moving along now and then.
Borderline on the mooshiness, though! I liked the bit about the rectal bleeding spell! Priceless!
Author's Response:
Another experimental chapter, this time on Mrs. Granger, whom we haven't seen in the movies AT ALL. I also can't recall the Grangers in any of the books, except being mentioned by Hermione.
This is a somewhat preparatory chapter to the story being unfolded.
Once again, thanks for your support.
Loved the ending! And the aside of a day out with Tonks is believable and very nice to read. Great work.
Author's Response:
I'm following Natalia Tena on Twitter and Facebook, and some of her one-liners tend to crack me up. I always imagined Tonks the same witty, loyal, strong person as Natalia, so this somewhat experimental chapter wasn't too hard to write.
Thanks for your time to R&R.
An interesting and well-done aside. I do like the things you've mentioned here, and find it unfortunate that JKR didn't do some stuff like this in the canon. Very good read.
Author's Response:
Thanks for your continued support to my scribbles.
I guess many of us do have these or similar questions, at least those who read between the lines. Too many untied ends, unexplained things in the seven books.
The possessive of Bellatrix should be Bellatrix's: this bit of punctuation trips me up as well! :)
Those are certainly some pointed questions that Harry poses to Hermione about Dumbledore's actions.... I'm intrigued to see how you'll answer them in this AU!
Author's Response:
Dear SP,
Huge thanks for this lovely review. Those questions have been bugging me for a while and I needed to put them down in a row.
I will still have to see whether I will be continuing this story; at this point I have some serious questions whether or not I should be writing an altenate HBP as well :D
Enjoy your weekend,
Zoltan
Well, this story starts off where it all goes south for the Wizarding world . . . HE!HE!HE!, . . . can't wait to see the twists and turns in the trails you send this hids down in this one!
BOO-BOO time:
machinally sipping from his Butterbeer in small gulps. I think you mean methodically, as you have Harry taking deliberate sips frrom his last butterbeer.
a drawing, a strikingly resembling portrait of Harry shuffle them around and it flows better: a drawing, a striking portrait of Harry, a good resemblance.
As always, it's up to you to take or leave my suggestions . . . you know me, I'm easy! HE!HE!HE! Picky and OCD but easy!
Author's Response:
I can't believe I've missed out on these reviews! * hides his head in the sand in shame *
Yeah, as I was watching HBP, I got this idea and simply HAD to start this story. On the other hand, I'm not sure I should continue at this point, or rather I'm not sure I should be rewriting the whole saga. I already have a post-Battle fic, an alternate DH; should I really begin with an alternate HBP?
As always, million thanks for the corrections. * bows humbly *
Take care,
Zoltan
Interesting take on this particular interim time period. I think you captured Harry's frame of mind quite well. You also raise questions that I have often wondered about, too. Good job!
Author's Response:
Welcome back, BKL, and thanks for the nice review.
The story doesn't end here, it's only a still somewhat messed-up intro chapter. Basically, until a certain point (most probably one more chapter LOL) I WILL stick to canon. After that, AU all the way. You know me :D
Those questions raised, however, will play a VERY important part in the story.
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